Christ, God and other words I’m afraid of.

Voicing the language of my new body of soul work is raising discomfort for me to feel and heal. The light of God, Christ and heaven’s above are some of the concepts you would never have found attached to my work. But I was shown these while visiting sacred sites across Australia, channelling the Temple of the Rose. Gulp. Here we go…

When I think of sharing Christ and God with my email subscribers, fear sets in. What if they subscribed because they are teachers wanting to learn about easing anxiety and depression or self-regulation in the classroom and they get smacked over the head with my Godly email? I feel the pink cringe in my cheeks, yet ahh, what a relief to spell it out! If this is you, you know where the unsubscribe button is. 🙂

God and Christ were so uncool. I recall my teenage years at an Anglican school, surrounded by my friends’ and my own belief to not believe in God; it was too goody-two-shoes, stupid and a waste of time. I also think about a conversation I had with family post Year 12, us scheming and laughing at the absurdity of someone we knew of who believed God gave her the gift of a beautiful sunrise for her birthday. Honestly, I was in disbelief someone could be so delusional.

New age spirituality was a safe zone. I was 23 when my curiosity, blotted with fear, led me to enter the intuitive world of Reiki and Spiritual Development. These circles opened my conscious spiritual awakening, working with ‘universal light’ and energy for ‘our highest good’, however the “G” and “C” words were used sparingly, if at all.

In 2012, God entered my world. During meditation in the hills of Darjeeling, India, it felt like a window was pushed open for light to pour in and I saw that God was, is everywhere and in everything; the hills, the sky, the houses, the land, the water, the people. This was a profound moment, yet I was shy to name God in this story when I shared it with my Soul Worker Academy community in 2016. It felt more aligned for me to teach about creation energy, oneness and the spiritual vs physical worlds and I certainly didn’t see God as a man in the sky or heaven as an actual place. But in 2019, I noticed I was becoming quietly drawn to people talking about Christ Consciousness.

My fear of naming God and Christ stem from abandonment, being refused entry and being alone. Being outed for believing such a ridiculous thing, being mocked, laughed at and cast aside. I see memories of that scary big Grade 6 who laughed at me when I fell over on the steps at the front of school in Prep, I see family members smirking at me and me making it mean I was stupid, not good enough, less than and powerless. And I can feel this in my body as a tightening in my belly, drained energy in my arms and a drawing down in my cheeks. Excuse me, as I open up the space for these feelings to express themselves with my undivided attention and watch them transform in dare I say, the light of Christ.

God and Christ was all too strange for me. I think of all those crazy, overzealous people in business suits on daytime TV speaking in a weird way about the Lord and other things from the Bible that I don’t understand. Or those awful songs I hear on what my family called Jesus-loving radio stations where the devotion has me feel ‘ick’ and I am driven to find a more ‘normal’ channel. And I recall the ‘strange’ circle of African-American women praying with their hands up, swaying, hmm-hmming and perhaps speaking in tongues in front of the White House when I visited Washington D.C. in 2010. I was turned off by it all.

On my trip around Australia, I got what I least expected. I knew I was in for a big spiritual upgrade but I expected more of what I knew. While the level of vividness and intricate detail I saw was extraordinary and brand new, I expected intuitive downloads, working with universal light and deep heartfelt connection with the Earth. But what I didn’t see coming was discovering the light of God, seeing him as a man in the sky, being given direct access to heaven (in the sky) and anchoring “Christ” Consciousness. On the outside, life looked normal; my family and I were visiting extraordinary places on an unforgettable trip. But on the inside, I was experiencing the biggest revelation of my life.

As I settle back into life, after living on the road for a quarter of 2025, there is a buzzing of resistance to share the truth of my being. I feel a slight attachment to you reading this, wanting you to accept me and stay, to keep my wounded self safe from being alone. But I know, deep down, abandoning myself and my work in the fear that you would leave me because I am speaking about God and Christ, is done with.

The cosmic joke is I love to be alone! As I write to you, I am living my best life, on my own at home, revelling in the quiet space, with solitude (aside from our new puppy Lulu sleeping next to me). And my heart offers a gentle reminder, I am safe, all is well and that I am loved beyond measure through the divine portal, the Temple of the Rose. The truth is we are all loved, through the portal of the sacred rose heart which is the essence of the teachings inside the Temple of the Rose, amongh other divine feminine mysteries.

This golden Christ Consciousness light, the light of God is not separate from universal energy, Source or life force energy; it is all one. I smile at how it’s taken me 20 years as a light worker, energy healer and spiritual intuitive to accept and reclaim the part of me that rejected God and Christ, out of fear of the weirdness, the strangeness and the lack of belongingness. I realise this is my gift to accept the ‘weird’ and ‘strange’ inside my body – thank you for arising, you’re welcome to stay as long as you like, I see you, I hear you, I feel you, I’m with you and I love you.

May my light shine as bright as yours. And so it is.

If you are denying your own divinity, stuck in other people’s beliefs about your or your life, abandoning your true spiritual beliefs, understanding, awareness and experiences in the fear of being alone, rejected, powerless or unsafe, then come and read about the freshly upgraded DIAMOND MENTORSHIP.